Oeste

There is a park over where all those cranes are on the waterfront in Oakland. There are a lot of signs along the sand telling you and showing you what is prohibited. Some examples include dogs, alcohol, bikes, cars, and swimming. Many of the garbage receptacles had flyers taped onto them informing citizens not to dispose of anything oily in there. ?????

The view is a beautiful one. I had a Floridian with me. He said you don't get this pink sky over there. It makes the water look sweet, like a candy factory pool. I know, I know - I want to make fun of me too. I'll take a picture of a bullfight or something next, to macho up.

On Tuesday, at our community meeting at school, I was last on the announcement list. I allowed my mild fury at the poor audience behavior to show through my stone cold gaze. The student working the lightboard shone a red light on me. And my audience came back. ("Look! They put her in red like the devil.")

The quarter's over at school. Grades are due. We have to show our grade reports to kids this week and have them assess themselves using these rubrics. They get mad and confused and defiant. They get upset. A few of them are okay. I am going to do this tomorrow.

Artist, Art, Hybrid

These are from Creativity Explored's Sci-fi opening. I met this one artist who led me around by the hand showing me her pieces and telling me to buy every single one of them because she wants a big check this year. There was a theramin player too, but I'm kind of over the theramin.

Tomorrow

I had too much wine to drink while grading yesterday so my head feels kind of tight right now. Or maybe it's because my head is so packed with the responsibilities I bear to make this job work that my brain is crying for me, feels dehydrated and that's the tight feeling.

Anyineedanewjobbeforeifallapartandget5150'd, this picture is for Dan. So was my opening confession. Tomorrow Dan's going back to Madrid, where he becomes, once again, a temporary ex-pat, teaching young Spanish people the subtleties of conversational English and trying to make a go of a business venture in the same vein with my summer host, Ana.

In less interesting news, when I took a break from working for a bit yesterday, I got on the private school jobs website and looked everywhere I could think of for a maternity leave position. I need someone at a privileged school to get knocked up or realize she's knocked up, now. That would mean there's a position at the end of spring and maybe into the fall! Or maybe someone will learn they are having multiples and need time off earlier rather than later for bed rest or something. Then I can save the day in January or something.

Please, encourage your private school teacher friends to do it. I'll make the Marvin Gaye cd to get everyone started. I'll make the dinner reservations too.

Well you know his birthday's just around the corner now

Don't do it! Do noooooot do it. Do not write about the "crisp autumn air" or pumpkin cookies or spiced lattes or scarves and tights. Do not - do you hear me? - do not use the word "cozy" or "snuggle". If I read one more lady blog about your "Fall Favorite Things" I'm going to have to go all hood rat on you.

When I read through blogs today I felt like I was trapped in an acid trip designed by Oprah and Martha Stewart. I could smell the lavender linen spray everywhere. When I finally closed my computer, I got up and fluffed a pillow before arranging my books by the color of their spines. Thank god I snapped out of it before I started laying them down horizontally and placing sea anemone shaped tchotchkes on top.

I know it's fall, but please ladies. We've already got the Home & Garden/Food Network All-Stars shoving fake fall leaves in our faces and on our cupcakes. Let us make it through this fall season without too many trips to Michael's. If I throw up in my mouth anymore today I might remove the remnants of tooth enamel that survived the first 50 little pukes.

You know this means gingerbread lattes and red turtlenecks form the Gap are just around the bend. Oh Easter Bunny, where are you when we need you?

My Mondays are different from your Mondays

So on my Mondays, I work straight from 9:00 to 3:55 with no break. I teach one 100 minute block followed by a 10 minute break to start my morning off. That break is used to mop up the remains of the last class and set up for the next. If I am lucky, I can manage to shove half of one of those heart shaped oat cake things in my mouth before some kid is standing in front of me asking me something like, "Did you get drunk this weekend?" or, a new favorite of some of your country's future, "What clubs do you go to?"

Then I have "lunch". This is a 30 minute piece of my day that happens like this:
"Alright everyone, pack your bags, push your chairs in and show me your planners on your way out the door!" I am trying to smile more, so while I say this, I look like I have some kind of hidden orthodontics in my mouth that make me make this face that shows my teeth - kind of the way a horse might look when people say it is smiling, but everyone knows it's not, really, because it is a horse and not a person. Then I look up and there are 10 minutes before my advisory period. Then maybe - mmmmmmaybe - I eat a yogurt too fast and my stomach feels funny for awhile. My last class is a poor man's version of the first two because I can't remember what I said to which class. My jokes are getting all mixed up and my horse smile looks weird, a little lopsided, like the horse is very very tired, which I am.

Finally everyone goes away and I am left with lots of work to do. People keep coming in and "need" to talk to me. I really "need" some whiskey and a double IPA. I really "need" you to just let me have 42 seconds to myself on my no food no pee days.

And then, when we were driving away to go see some friends who have normal lives and can go out on week nights without accepting zombie-like lives the morning after, there were goats. This lady who did a tarot reading for me, she gave me a card to take home and it had a a goat on it. She said it was playful and that I should try to have more fun in my life. She also said I should sleep around a bit. I said okay.

So there were goats at the bottom of the hill from work. In the city. Near Candlestick. I think they were working.

Thank you for coming ladies and gentlemen

He got married. This is the part where the bride and groom go around and say hi to everyone. There was an open bar with whiskey, any way you like it. I like it in a glass in my hand.

I've been working 500 hours a day. More no say can.

It is what it is

I think I received a negative paycheck. There was so much taken out I wanted to call the President. But no. We're going to call Malu and see if she'll come and explain all of this to us. But I don't think I want to understand it. I want it to stop! Call the President somebody!

Make me pay back student loans while I'm teaching these kids? Call the President! Pay the PG & E bill that goes up and up and up every month? Stop! Call the President! Make me teach a roomful of my Social Security earners on less money a year per pupil than any other state? Call the po-lice!

It'd be great if the mob ran schools. We'd have everything we need and no kid'd ever be out of line.

Eff you, pay me.

(p.s. I don't want to ruin the gangster mood, but the picture is from happy hour last week, before we knew about the money.)